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15 Difficult Feelings that mean you’re Evolving

By Rick Riddle on Tuesday May 10th, 2016

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Are life's challenges preparing you for a rebirth?

Changing and evolving are difficult things to do. In fact, they are so difficult that doing so or even planning to do so can drum up all types of feelings that aren’t very pleasant at all.

Unfortunately, many people interpret these uncomfortable feelings as signs that they shouldn’t proceed. So, they stop and so does the progress they were making.

If you are in the midst of making important changes in your life, here are 15 uncomfortable feelings that are actually telling you that you are on the right track.

Changing and evolving are difficult things to do.Changing and evolving are difficult things to do.

1. Feeling Isolated from Others

Undergoing change at a deep and personal level is a lonely task. It’s something you must go through on your own. As a result, it is normal to feel isolated from others, and as if they couldn’t possibly understand what you are going through.

2. Having Difficulty Focusing on Tasks

Life change requires a lot of involvement and engagement on the part of your right brain. That doesn’t leave much energy left for your left brain. The left hemisphere is the side of your brain you use to perform practical tasks. The fact that you forget phone numbers and names, misplace things, or feel as if you must do everything twice to get it right is perfectly normal. It is a sign that the changes you are undergoing are deep and meaningful.

Life changes don't leave much energy for the left side of the brain.Life changes don’t leave much energy for the left side of the brain.

3. Feeling Restless and Anxious

Whether you are making a job change, a spiritual change, a relationship change, or something else, your emotions are in a continually stimulated sense. In addition to this, there is a good chance that your brain, including your imagination, is constantly in high gear. This can result in stress, which can lead to feelings of restlessness and anxiety.

4. Irritability at Those You Are Close To

If you are making or undergoing positive changes, why do you feel so irritated at the people you love? There’s a reason for these uncomfortable feelings. The people that you care about are often the reasons why you don’t change. They may unconsciously discourage you from changing out of fear of losing you, or they may simply follow the same behavior patterns that you are trying to break, e.g., financial irresponsibility. This can result in subtle resentments that can really come to the surface during this time.

It is normal to feel restless, anxious and irritable.It is normal to feel restless, anxious and irritable.

5. Feeling Gripping Fear at Times

Change is frightening. Big change is terrifying. This is so true that you may find yourself in a near state of panic at times. This just means that the change you are undergoing is very real, very meaningful, and very permanent.

6. A New Tendency to Be Confrontational

Chances are, if you are taking action to grow and change, you were really dissatisfied with many aspects of your life. Now, you have decided you deserve better, not just from yourself, but also from others. Because of this, you may find yourself ‘calling people out’ in situations where you would normally let things go.

You have decided you deserve better.You have decided you deserve better.

7. Becoming More Dissatisfied

Just like you may find yourself becoming more confrontational with people, you may also experience and act on dissatisfaction in other ways. This too is a result of wanting better things for yourself and being more and more willing to demand them.

8. Feeling Lost

If you feel lost in the midst of making a change or growing, it doesn’t mean that you are on the wrong path. What it means is that you are dealing with new experiences, new emotions, new expectations, and ultimately a new reality. That’s a lot to deal with. It should come as no surprise that you find yourself questioning whether or not you know what to do next or even know who you are anymore.

Feeling lost doesn’t mean that you are on the wrong path.Feeling lost doesn’t mean that you are on the wrong path.

9. Feeling a Strong Desire to Be Alone More Often

This one is especially true for introverts who are making life changes and taking action to grow. You are spending so much emotional energy on the changes you are making that human interaction can be a major drain. You may also have an increasing desire to spend more time in solitude meditating, writing in a journal, doing yoga, or engaging in other solitary activities to help yourself get entered.

10. Beginning to Question Your Friendships

When you make changes, you are essentially questioning your life. This includes your relationships with your friends. You may find yourself questioning whether or not you are still compatible with your friends, and whether or not your relationships with your friends are healthy ones. It may be that your changed self just needs time to adjust before you can renew old friendships, or it could be that you will see that you have friendships that are no longer sustainable. The latter can be difficult to accept, but it is still a sign that you are on the right track.

You may also have an increasing desire to spend more time in solitude.You may also have an increasing desire to spend more time in solitude.

11. Feeling Intense Sadness

No major change or growth happens without loss. Sometimes the loss is more tangible, such as the loss of a job or the ending of a relationship. Other times the loss is less tangible. For example, you may have decided to drop some negative habits and behaviors, and while you know making the change is for the best, you are still sad at the loss.

12. Dreading the Future

It is completely normal to dread the future. After all, you have taken what was a known, good or bad, and turned it into an unknown. You have no idea where your new path will eventually lead. That can make the future feel like a scary place. If you feel dread, that is perfectly normal.

You have no idea where your new path will eventually lead.

13. Desiring for Things to Be Like They Used to Be

Familiarity is one of the safest feelings. Even negative familiarity can temporarily feel better than change. There will be points in your journey where all you want is for things to be the way they were. In addition to this, when life becomes complex and difficult, it is perfectly normal to regress a bit and seek past comforts, people, and simplicity.

14. Having Strange and Intense Dreams

Strange and intense dreams, even negative ones, are the cumulative result of new experiences, new emotions, and internal and external conflicts. They are your subconscious mind’s way of working out a lot of heavy stuff while you sleep.

Strange dreams are your subconscious mind’s way of working out a lot of heavy stuff.

15. Desiring to Cut off Romantic Relationships

Emotionally, while you are making a change, you may begin to doubt your ability to give the time and emotional effort needed to keep romantic relationships going. You may feel as if your partner deserves more, or you may also feel as if it is you that deserves more. The important thing is to not make these kinds of decisions prematurely.

As you can see, some seemingly uncomfortable feelings can actually be a sign that you are on the right track towards your life purpose. Next time when you feel lost or sad or have a strong desire to be alone, maybe it’s time to listen to your inner self to better understand what you really want.

How do you feel about this article? Join the conversation.

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Words By Rick Riddle

Originally posted on Life Advancer

 

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  • Jean Priice

    Interesting article with some truth to it many don’t know about change! These are normal feelings and worthy of exploring, and also of boundaries if they seem to be getting out of control. When we change, we need support as we practice the change, and this is often hard for our old support system. It can cause discomfort and they may try to bring you back to your old way of being! I think it’s important to communicate with them during a change so they will know where they stand and if they still have a part in your life. Change can be painful, and bring many feeling to the surface. Dealing with those feeling is what grief work is…and without the work, our changes can have major impacts we’re not aware of. If you follow this model: CHANGE=LOSS=FEELINGS….pain and joy and all the many feeling we are capable of…you begin to realize that grief is a process of accepting those feeling and working through them OR denying them and spiraling down into a unhealthy place that negates the change!! Name a change and I will name a loss…even changes like parenthood and retirement have grief issues attached and are often overlooked because we “should” be happy! Change creates a new world view for us, and we can make it be about growth or about shrinking into a protective shell. The more positive results of change have a lot to do with having the courage and desire to explore and share and process the feelings we go through. And since life is change…we have great reasons to learn and grow from both the changes we seek and those that just come to us. We can also find ourselves in the process!

  • Katie

    such a great article and resonated so much with me given all the personal work I’ve been doing. Made me feel like I wasn’t alone and not crazy for feeling the feelings I have been. Thank you for writing this, i’ve passed on to many people that I think it could help!!

  • Rafael Lecuona

    Sounds like Depression

    • Isuzu

      Depression is the end result of staying

      • Rafael Lecuona

        Yes. And sometimes the beginning of “going.”

    • Cleogrrl

      Depression is a mental illness of unknown etiology, and generally treatable.

      • Rafael Lecuona

        Generally treatable yet generally untreated. The mental mindset described in this article closely mirrors classic symptoms of depression. Curiously, depression and deep pain often can lead a person to deep introspection and personal transformation.

  • Isuzu

    Spot on… I have been wanting a divorce for 13 years. Ive tried to work with the difficult situation, around it or ignore it.. I started escaping from it by travelling by myself but nothing worked. We negotiated building separate house but in the end the only option was a break… Its day 3 and the emotions are raw but there is an underlying deep knowing that we will both benefit…
    I see that someone mentioned that it sounded like depression… That is one of the problems you finish up with if you work hard to stay….

    • Marjorie

      And then when you’re very depressed it is crippling. I’m finding myself feeling emotionally crippled because making change means giving up what was my security and the person I consider a dear family member. I lost my mom when I was 10 and this feels like I’m creating another death and I can’t make a move.

      • Isuzu

        There is no other way… When we resist what is calling us is when the depression starts or get worse…..
        Make sure you have friends who will/can support you. You dont flog them to death but you move amongst them looking for even small amounts of positive feedback then spend time on your own learning to master that voice which is mostly negative.. Its trying to keep you anchored using fear… Contemplate the possibility that your move will result in a good outcome. (now there is a challenge) Its not easy and you may struggle at times but you can break through that with perseverance…. and when that first flicker of light does show it will seem so bright and inspirational…. Im walking that exact path now… You can do it

        • Marjorie

          Thank you for your kind words

  • Sunny

    tottally on point. I wish I could connect with others feeling the same ( on a deeper face to face rather than on the internet ).

  • Marjorie

    Really emotional article for me to read as I relate to every point. I’m struggling very much with wanting to stay in my familiar life or make a change that creates too much emotional pain to handle

  • JOIE JAMESON,R.N.

    Change is the only thing consistent in our life.

  • independentthought

    Excellent …

  • Nellis Basson

    This sounds a lot like my depression… so I’ve been changing my whole life?

  • Paula

    Change is inherent in life, if we fixate on settling down by seeing life as departments that need to be structured and stay that way forever, we are simply out of synch with the essence of life and its vital flow altogether!

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